I am standing with Ellen P just inside the back door of a rather modern house finished with dark wood and lots of glass but not much furniture. We are talking and I am wondering if I could ask her to have sex with me when I see a man enter the house through the front doors, a pair of French doors which are mostly glass with mullions of dark wood. Suddenly angry at the intruder, I run around through the kitchen and dining room to find a small crowd of men standing in the entryway. When I yell at them to get out they ignore me and instead one of them, shorter but heavier than I am and wearing a light blue shirt and pants, comes striding out towards me. Intimidated, I turn and walk quickly ahead of him back to the kitchen.
Because of my ALS I would not be able to overpower him so instead I take control of the dream, place the man against the wall with his back to me and pierce him several times in the lower back with the sharp point of a pair of sheep shearing clippers. Though I did not stab him deeply, he is dead so I continue into the next room, a bedroom with no furniture other than a mattress on the floor in the corner. Another man, taller and thinner than the first man but also dressed in blue, confronts me. Very angry now, I stab him in the belly with my shears then thrust upward, forcing his slimy bluish guts to erupt out of his chest while Ellen cowers under a blanket in a corner.

I awoke from this dream gasping as if I had been holding my breath for a long time but I wondered if my breathlessness was just from the intensity of my anger. I had been down all day, unclear about the exact reason for my depression but suspecting that it might be associated with feeling that I was becoming a burden to Darchelle. Anger at her, redirected at myself, could have triggered the depression and inspired the dream.
A year later I had another dream which gave me insight into this one, which is apparently about my refusal to hope in God.
Alternatively, this dream might be about my rejection of Christianity, and of the self-condemnation which I incorporated into my faith right from the start. This interpretation is supported by a dream ten years ago in which a man in light blue killed me. That dream depicted my adoption of Christianity as an act of self-destruction. This dream depicts my rejection of Christianity as an act of self-defense.